'Til I Die

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"'Til I Die"
Single by The Beach Boys
from the album Surf's Up
Released 11 October 1971
Format Vinyl
Recorded Unknown
Genre Baroque Pop
Length 2 min 41 sec
Label Brother Records
Producer The Beach Boys
The Beach Boys singles chronology
"Long Promised Road"/"Deirdre"
(1971)
"Long Promised Road"/"'Til I Die"
(1971)
"Surf's Up"/"Don't Go Near the Water"
(1971)

"'Til I Die" is the title of a song written by Brian Wilson for The Beach Boys, on their 1971 album Surf's Up.

Contents

According to Brian Wilson in his autobiography, in one particular night in spring 1971, he drove to a beach, parked his car and walked onto the deserted beach. In Brian Wilson's own words,

Lately I'd been depressed, preoccupied with death. I'd ordered the gardener to dig a grave in the backyard and threatened to drive my Rolls off the Santa Monica pier. Looking out toward the ocean, my mind, as it did almost every hour of every day, worked to explain the inconsistencies that dominated my life: the pain, torment, and confusion and the beautiful music I was able to make. Was there an answer? Did I have no control? Had I ever?

[1] Brian then goes on to explain that he was

feeling shipwrecked on an existential island, I lost myself in the blanket of darkness that stretched beyond the breaking waves to the other side of the Earth. The ocean was so incredibly vast, the universe so large, and suddenly I saw myself in proportion to that, a little pebble of sand, a jellyfish floating on top of the water, traveling with the current. I felt dwarfed, temporary.

[1] Brian continues that,

The next day I began writing "Till I Die", perhaps the most personal song I ever wrote for the Beach Boys. In doing so I wanted to re-create the swell of emotions I'd felt at the beach the previous night. For several weeks, I struggled at the piano, experimenting with rhythms and chord changes, trying to emulate in sound the ocean's shifting tides and moods as well as its sheer enormity. I wanted the music to reflect the loneliness of floating a raft in the middle of the Pacific. I wanted each note to sound as if it was disappearing into the hugeness of the universe.

[1]

Although Brian wrote the song about how he was feeling at the time, the rest of the band didn't seem too impressed with Brian Wilson's new material. Brian remembers that "it was...obvious that I was out of synch with everyone when I played them a new song I'd written, ''Til I Die.'"[1]

After the song had finished playing, Mike Love "laughed out of disgust",[1] claiming how much of a downer the song was. According to Brian, his brother Carl Wilson and Al Jardine both agreed with Mike Love. "'We make upbeat albums...That's what our fans like'"[1] was the response from Mike Love, according to Brian. Brian continues, "Crushed by the rejection, I walked out of the studio knowing the song was good but that I was unable to defend myself. Several days later, I went into the studio by myself and recorded 'Till I Die' anyway. It was something I had to do. Eventually, out of respect, but mostly because they needed material, the song was included on the album."[1]

An extended mix, created by Steve Desper, is included on the Endless Harmony Soundtrack and was reportedly done only for the engineer's self-interest with no intent for the song to be placed on Surf's Up (album). It is notable for having each instrumental layer come in after the other as an introduction and features more prominent xylophone and organ throughout.

  1. ^ a b c d e f g Wouldn't It Be Nice: My Own Story by Brian Wilson and Todd Gold. Published by Harpercollins, 1991. ISBN 0-06-018313-6
Surf's Up Track Listing
Don't Go Near the Water | Long Promised Road | Take A Load Off Your Feet | Disney Girls (1957) | Student Demonstration Time
Feel Flows | Lookin' at Tomorrow (A Welfare Song) | A Day in the Life of a Tree | 'Til I Die | Surf's Up
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