Al Bundy

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Al Bundy's classic couch pose.
Al Bundy's classic couch pose.

Al Bundy (born ca. 1948) is a fictional character from the U.S. television series Married... with Children, played by Ed O'Neill.

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The series never specified what name "Al" was short for, but the creators of the show said it was short for "Albert" or just "Al" (it should be noted that in the episode dealing with the overdue library book, the librarian called him Alfonse Bundy). He is a slovenly character who finds himself constantly downtrodden by life and forever regretful of the turns his life has taken since the end of high school, when an injury prevented him from playing college football. The character was so popular that it has left O'Neill somewhat typecast since the series ended production.

Al Bundy is married to Peg Bundy, a shopping-crazed housewife who is unemployed, and does not cook or clean. He mistakenly asked her to marry him after he got drunk and was forced to follow through by her shotgun-wielding father. He has two children: Kelly, a promiscuous, dumb blonde, and Bud, a perpetually horny nerd. Al is the proud owner of a '73 Dodge Dart, built back in the era of American automotive T-Rex cars, and lives in Chicago. He works as a shoe salesman at the fictional Garry's Shoes and Accessories in the fictional New Market Mall. Al hates his job, loses it several times throughout the series, yet always ends up coming back to it. While it is suggested throughout the show that Al makes minimum-wage, it is likely an exaggeration, as the Bundy's have a rather typical home that would be impossibly out of reach for a minimum-wage worker.

Despite being a somewhat phlegmatic and slow person, Bundy has a very dry sense of humor, and a definite love for his family, though that can still be traded for a fair amount of money. On the rare occasions where he enjoys luxury and money, Al indeed expresses love for his family, perhaps indicating his distaste for them is spawned merely by his blaming them for his poor quality of life.

He hates fat women, his job, the prospect of having sex with his wife, his feminist neighbor Marcy D'Arcy, and the French. He loves dirty magazines, free beer, bowling, "nudie" bars, and often cherishes the glory moment of his past - scoring four touchdowns in one game while playing for the fictional Polk HS Panthers football team. He also says he won the 1966 city championship for Polk High by scoring a touchdown in the final seconds vs. fictional Andrew Johnson High School. His favorite movie is Hondo, favorite sitcom - Psycho Dad.

Al's talents include playing baseball, going bowling, cooking on the barbecue (wearing an apron that says "Kiss the Cook, Kill the Wife"), getting into and winning fistfights, and being able to survive incredible injuries ranging from falling off the Bundy roof when installing a satellite dish, to getting electrocuted by that same dish, to getting pulverized by a massive woman wrestler in Las Vegas. Al also has an encyclopedic memory for sports trivia, which usually serves to demonstrate how he has almost no life whatsoever.

Bundy and his friends founded "NO MA'AM," the "National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood". Its purpose is to fight the increasing power of women all over society.


  • Go away, Peg.
  • I'm the only guy in the world who has to wake up to have a nightmare.
  • A man's home is his coffin.
  • Women. Can't live with them. The End.
  • Entertainment for the cave man was simple: Man kills food, woman burns it, giant pterodactyl swoops down, chases woman, woman falls in mud. A good laugh is had by all.
  • Peg, I suspect your mind, much like the lost continent of Atlantis, no longer appears on any map.
  • I'm so upset I can hardly eat this sandwich.
  • Am I truly nothing? Could the neighbourhood children be right?
  • Now wait a second. My pretty teenage daughter with the brain of a fruit-fly earned a thousand dollars in three nights. Should I be worried?
  • The only power I sensed was that of the mighty forces unleashed by beans.
  • Ok, here's another idea. Let's toss this in the oven and see if it bakes. There's a shoe-salesman in the 23rd century. It's called Shoe Trek.
  • Peg, you can stab me with knives, you can beat me with clubs, you can make me open my eyes when we're having sex, but there's no way on earth you can make me get a second job.
  • The opera isn't over until the last heterosexual falls asleep.
  • The last thing a guy wants to look at at the end of the day is a woman.
  • How about if I get my gun and shoot you with a nice silver bullet?
  • Back then mother meant cooking but then, gay meant happy.
  • I was driving home, God knows why...
  • I hate my life. Can't eat, can't sleep, can't bury the wife in the backyard.
  • Peg, feed me, or feed me TO something. I just want to be part of the food chain. (from "The Dance Show" episode)
  • It's only cheating when you get caught.
  • Sure selling shoes is fun. But behind the glamour, it's like any other minimum wage slow death.
  • Sorry, Peg, I didn't hear you. I was thinking of killing myself.
  • Let's rock!

Peg : You haven't been very nice to my family.
Al : Neither has nature, go bother it!

Marcy : I am Marcy D'Arcy here on behalf of the Coalition for the Aesthetically Challenged.
Al : Challenged? I'd say defeated, exiled and left for dead!

Peg : Ooh baby! Is that a nightstick or are you just happy to see me?
Al : It's a nightstick, Peg, and I'm not afraid to use it!

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