Conversation

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Lenin and Stalin in friendly banter
Lenin and Stalin in friendly banter

Conversation is the verbalization of concepts involving abstractions and concrete objects which make up the world we live in.

A conversation is communication by two or more people, or sometimes with one's self, often on a particular topic. Conversations are the ideal form of communication in some respects, since they allow people with different views of a topic to learn from each other. A speech, on the other hand, is an oral presentation by one person directed at a group.

Those engaging in conversation naturally relate the other speaker's statements to themselves, and insert themselves (or some degree of relation to themselves, ranging from the replier's opinions or points to actual stories about themselves) into their replies. For a successful conversation, the partners must achieve a workable balance of contributions. A successful conversation includes mutually interesting connections between the speakers or things that the speakers know. For this to happen, those engaging in conversation must find a topic on which they both can relate to in some sense.

Conversation analysis is a branch of sociology which studies the structure and organization of human interaction, with a more specific focus on conversational interaction.

Contents

Sometimes, when talking colloquially, banter can be referred to as "bants".

Conversation conducted in formal but unstructured settings can be particularly valuable in enlivening those in the growing population of retired, and sometimes otherwise isolated, people in advanced countries. Institutions such as the University of the Third Age provide such settings. Here the great diversity of life experience and points of view provide a very rich resource for advanced learning.

"Banter" or "O-shaberi" (O-Shabs) in Japanese, is non-serious conversation usually between friends, which may rely on humour at the expense of those taking part or in-jokes. Banter is particularly difficult for those on the autism spectrum, or those with semantic pragmatic disorder.

Television programs described as "talk shows," such as William F. Buckley's Firing Line or the Dick Cavett Show, can be considered as exercises in conversation. In entertainment talk shows, however, the conversation is often pre-scripted.

Broadly speaking, conversation can be divided into four categories[citation needed] according to its major content: conversations about ideas, conversations about concrete objects and facts, conversations about other people (usually absent) and conversations about "me". Each of these types of conversation has its own cluster of purposes and expectations attached, and each serves a different social purpose. Conversation about ideas serves to extend understanding and awareness, conversation about concrete objects and facts primarily serves to consolidate a group world view, conversation about others not present (gossip) serves to boost self esteem, and conversation about "me" is a means of attracting attention from others. In the real world no conversation falls exclusively into one category. Nevertheless the proportional distribution of any given conversation between the categories can offer useful psychological insights into the mind set of the participants.

A study completed in July 2007 by Matthias Mehl of the University of Arizona shows that contrary to popular belief, there is little difference in the number of words used by men and women in conversation[1]. The study showed that on average each of the sexes uses about 16,000 words per day.

Authors who have written extensively on conversation and attempted to analyze its nature include:

  • Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Al Switzler, and Ron McMillan have written two New York Times bestselling books on conversation. The first one, "Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High," McGraw-Hill, 2002, teaches skills for handling disagreement and high-stakes issues at work and at home. The second book, "Crucial Confrontations: Tools for Resolving Broken Promises, Violated Expectations, and Bad Behavior," McGraw-Hill, 2005, teaches important skills for dealing with accountability issues.
  • Charles Blattberg has written two books defending an approach to politics that emphasizes conversation, in contrast to negotiation, as the preferred means of resolving conflict. His From Pluralist to Patriotic Politics: Putting Practice First, Oxford and New York: Oxford University Press, 2000, ISBN 0-19-829688-6, is a work of political philosophy; and his Shall We Dance? A Patriotic Politics for Canada, Montreal and Kingston: McGill Queen's University Press, 2003, ISBN 0-7735-2596-3, applies that philosophy to the Canadian case.


  1. ^ [1] Roxanne Khamsi, NewScientist.com news service 6 July 2007: Men – the other talkative sex.I thank them for letting them me do this research. Retrieved 8 July 2007. (Original article Are Women Really More Talkative Than Men? Mehl et al., Science 6 July 2007: 82 DOI: 10.1126/science.1139940.)

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