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“Patriot Games”
Family Guy episode
Episode no.	Season 4 Episode 20
Written by	Mike Henry
Directed by	Cyndi Tang
Guest stars	Tom Brady, Carol Channing, Bob Costas, Jay Leno, Troy Brown
Production no.	4ACX25
Original airdate	January 29, 2006
Season 4 episodes
Family Guy - Season 4 May 1, 2005 – May 21, 2006
North by North Quahog Fast Times at Buddy Cianci, Jr. High Blind Ambition Don't Make Me Over The Cleveland-Loretta Quagmire Petarded Brian the Bachelor 8 Simple Rules for Buying My Teenage Daughter Breaking Out Is Hard to Do Model Misbehavior Peter's Got Woods Perfect Castaway Jungle Love PTV Brian Goes Back to College The Courtship of Stewie's Father The Fat Guy Strangler The Father, the Son, and the Holy Fonz Brian Sings and Swings Patriot Games I Take Thee Quagmire Sibling Rivalry Deep Throats Peterotica You May Now Kiss the...Uh...Guy Who Receives Petergeist Untitled Griffin Family History Stewie B. Goode (1) Bango Was His Name Oh! (2) Stu and Stewie's Excellent Adventure (3)
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List of Family Guy episodes

“Patriot Games” is an episode from season four of FOX animated television series Family Guy. Guest starring Tom Brady, Carol Channing, Bob Costas, Jay Leno, and Troy Brown, all as themselves. The episode title references the Tom Clancy novel/film, Patriot Games.

At Peter’s high school reunion, Peter pretends to be a cowboy astronaut millionaire to impress his classmates, but the truth comes out when he meets Tom Brady. He subsequently gets drunk and has to make a run for the bathroom, knocking over everyone between him and the toilet, in order to throw up. Brady is impressed and lands Peter a spot on the New England Patriots football team as the starting center. Life is great for the Griffins until Peter’s new high profile goes to his head and he’s traded to the London Silly Nannies. Peter decides to turn them around and stage a game between the Silly Nannies and the Patriots. The Patriots cause his team to run away, leaving Peter facing the Patriots alone. He attempts to play, but he is overwhelmed and defeated. However, Tom Brady compliments Peter on having the nerve to stand up to them.

Meanwhile, Stewie becomes a sports bookie. After Brian loses $50 betting on Mike Tyson to beat Carol Channing on Celebrity Boxing, Brian procrastinates in paying off the bet. Because of this, he’s savagely beaten by Stewie in the bathroom. Some time later, Brian still hasn’t paid up, and he tries to avoid Stewie by disguising himself with a fake mustache. Stewie sees through his disguise and pushes Brian down the stairs, beats him with more force, culminating with Brian getting shot in both knees and being set on fire. After they go to the bank and he settles the debt, Stewie offers “one free revenge shot” to make up for it. Brian leaves him in suspense as to when the free hit will be delivered, until Stewie is overcome with paranoia and starts beating himself up, hoping to satisfy Brian. At the very end of the episode, Brian takes the revenge shot by pushing Stewie in front of a moving London bus.

Peter as a New England Patriot

• Although the United Kingdom does not have a professional American football league, the amateur British American Football League features two teams in London: the London Blitz and the London Olympians. Tom Brady refers to the London Silly Nannies as the worst team; the London Olympians are actually the most successful club in the history of the league.
• The part where Stewie beats up Brian in the bathroom is referenced in the episode “Airport ’07” when Brian goes to warn Stewie not to drink from Peter’s spit cup, only to recall how badly Stewie assaulted him in the bathroom. Brian then says, “Ah, never mind,” leaving Stewie to drink and scream in disgust.
• The first football team the Patriots play against is the Washington Redskins; the second is the Dallas Cowboys.
• Quagmire’s mention that he was looking for Lois’s toenails in the garbage is a callback to the scene in “Emission Impossible” where Quagmire puts the hair from Lois’s hairbrush on a sex doll with Lois’s face on it and says, “A couple of teeth and some toenail clippings and we’ll be ready for our date.”

• On the Volume 4 DVD release, a deleted scene involved Peter showing the London Silly Nannies the American version of the sitcom The Office and pointing out how the American version is vastly different from the British version to get them mad and prepped for the game against the New England Patriots.

This article or section contains too many minor or trivial fictional references. Mere trivia, or references unimportant to the overall plot of a work of fiction, should be deleted. See also what Wikipedia is.

• Fred Flintstone stammers “Bet-bet-bet-bet!” as he did in The Flintstones episode “The Gambler,” where Fred goes crazy whenever someone mentions the word “bet” (only in the Family Guy version, he realizes there’s nothing funny about having a gambling addiction and ends up discouraging Indian Gaming).
• At one point in the episode, the outside of the Griffin's flat is shown. Mr. Bean's lime-green Mini is shown in the foreground.
• According to DVD commentary, the way Stewie severely beats Brian up is based on the show’s take on The Sopranos.
• Stewie dunking Brian’s face in the toilet, yelling “Where’s my money?” is similar to the opening scene of The Big Lebowski.
• Before the beating of Brian, Stewie drinks a glass of orange juice, referring to The Godfather movies using oranges as a symbol of imminent death or injury.
• Lois mentions Peter frivolously spending money on a wax sculpture depicting Gwyneth Paltrow having sex with Harriet Tubman. (On the commentary, it was revealed that originally the creators wanted R2-D2 having sex with Gwyneth Paltrow, but LucasFilm turned them down, for the first time).
• The song Peter sings while showboating after a touchdown, “Shipoopi,” is from the 1957 Broadway play The Music Man.
• The Silly Nannies dance around a maypole and sing Gilbert and Sullivan’s “’Tis Twelve, I Think” from The Sorcerer.
• Whilst in England Lois watches a program on the digital channel BBC Four. The show depicted is a parody of the channel’s intellectual, esoteric content. Family Guy is actually shown on analog channel BBC Two and digital channel BBC Three.
• During the fight between Mike Tyson and Carol Channing on Fox Celebrity Boxing, during one of Tyson’s bashings, it cuts away to two men under the ring, which is the same as the final round in Rocky III where Apollo Creed says, “He’s getting beaten!”, then Paulie says, “No, he’s getting mad!”
• The song that Peter sings in his commercial has the same melody as Homer Simpson’s “Mr. Plow” jingle. (Both are parodies of a long-running jingle for Roto-Rooter.)
• On the stadium wall one sign says “John 3:16.” This is the second time in the series that sign is seen. The first is in the “Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington” episode in which Chris’s letter says “John 3:16” (and the Lord said, “Go Sox").
• The part where Peter is the "Green Guy" in the digital world, it is a parody of the 1982 Disney film Tron