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The Weekly World News (WWN) is a mock tabloid newspaper published by American Media Inc. Its editor in chief is Jeff Rovin. It combines wire reports of strange news with in-house writings and columns, all fictional. There was also a short lived TV version on the USA Network in the style of network news shows. On 25 October 2005, the company released a compilation anthology called Batboy Lives! by David Perel and the Editors.[1]

Contents 1 Description 2 Recurring subjects 2.1 Bat Boy 2.2 A Scientist 2.3 Page 5 Girl 2.4 Elvis Presley 2.5 The World's Fattest... 2.6 "ALIVE!" 2.7 Upcoming Economic Depressions 2.8 Religion and Biblical Relics 2.9 War on Terrorism 2.10 The Presidency 2.11 Aliens 2.12 Cryptids 2.12.1 Merpeople 2.13 Freeze Dried Baby 2.14 Amateur Penectomy 3 Other stories 4 Popular culture 5 See also 5.1 Overview of Website 5.1.1 Headlines 6 External links

Launched in 1979, the WWN has traditionally claimed it always prints the truth (typical slogan: "Nothing but the truth: The Weekly World News!"). Based on the headlines, however, it seems many stories are intended as jokes. Seeming to confirm this, Batboy Lives!' semi-serious introduction admits that while Reader A reads the tabloid for real news, Reader B will read it for laughs. It should be noted that while the tabloid's main rival The Sun carried a fine print disclaimer, the WWN never publicly questioned the accuracy of its own stories until 2004, when the paper began stating that "the reader should suspend disbelief for the sake of enjoyment". In recent years, The Sun has moved more toward articles on health, miracle cures, and strange-but-true stories, leaving the WWN alone in its unique niche of basing an entire weekly publication on made-up "news". Some people believe that in the 21 century, the tabloid has grown even more farcical.

When most of the supermarket tabloids were acquired by Fleet Street publishers, they switched to celebrity gossip, but the Weekly World News remains devoted to weirdness. In fact, the introduction to Batboy Lives! quotes former managing editor Sal Ivon "If someone calls me up and says their toaster is talking to them, I don't refer them to professional help, I say, 'Put the toaster on the phone'." The WWN is also unique in that it is printed entirely in black and white. Like most of the tabloids in the U.S., the Weekly World News is published in Boca Raton, Florida. Its longtime editor was Eddie Clontz, who left the paper in 2001 and died in 2004.[2]

Regular columns include Ed Anger (opinion), Dear Dottie (relationship advice), Horse Sense (medical advice), Monkey Business (financial and business-related advice and information) and Madame Malisa (psychic).

Semi-regular stories follow the progress of Bat Boy, the half-bat, half-boy superhero; and P'lod, an extraterrestrial who became involved in Earth politics and had an affair with Hillary Clinton. Other recurring themes include the oncoming great depression/apocalypse, and newly found lost prophecies.

Likewise, throughout 2003, just prior to the capture of Saddam Hussein, and persisting after his capture, WWN ran a series of articles on an alleged romance between him and Osama bin Laden.

The "couple" apparently had a steamy, sensual affair, before a wedding was performed, with Hussein as the bride and bin Laden as the groom. Later, they traveled the globe, ending up in France. They adopted a shaved ape baby (Robert) that posed as a human child. After an argument, Hussein left for Iraq to be comforted in his home town of Tikrit by family and friends, and hid in the spider hole until Bat Boy discovered him.

In the recent past, WWN ran a story claiming that George W. Bush was openly campaigning to become the next Pope.

WWN has also produced series of stories on alien abductions, the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, and time travel. (In one of the latest, Iraq is revealed to possess a time tunnel capable of facilitating time travel.)

The WWN has frequently reported Elvis sightings starting in the early 1990s with a series of articles claiming that Elvis Presley had faked his death and had recently emerged from years of seclusion to prepare for a comeback. Obviously altered photos purported to show a gray-haired balding Elvis sneaking into a movie theater and coming out of a Burger King restaurant. When the US Postal Service conducted a poll to determine the design of the Elvis commemorative postage stamp, the WWN conducted its own poll pitting the USPS' 1950s Elvis and 1970s Elvis versus their own 1990s Elvis. The WWN's Elvis naturally won.

Sometimes stories published in the Weekly World News will send shock waves through the legal and law enforcement communities. For example, in early 1989, WWN published startling photographs on the front page of executed serial killer Ted Bundy on the autopsy table. Electrode burns on Bundy's shaved head with his fixed and dilated pupils staring into space could clearly be seen in the photographs. Angry and surprised officials in Florida vowed to catch the person responsible. Eventually, a low-level employee of the Alachua County, Florida Medical Examiners office was arrested and charged with taking and selling the photographs.

More recently, however, WWN has gone through some drastic changes.

Beginning on May 9th, 2005, the Weekly World News went "All New", along with other tabloid papers, such as the National Enquirer which recently became "Bigger•Bolder•Better". In the new Weekly World News, Serena and Sonya Sabak's psychic column was replaced by the horoscopes of Madame Malisa and Dotti Primrose's "Dear Dotti" was supplanted by an advice column called "Hi, Dolly!" written by a middle-aged, blonde woman reared somewhere south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

WWN now has a weekly "Weird Picture Search" by famed Mad cartoonist Sergio Aragones.

Also making the scene is WWN's new feature, "Miss Adventure", "The Gayest American Hero", who has penetrated the mob, gone to Hollywood, fought Dragula travelling from the depths of the Earth's center to Outer Space.

Two pages of comic strips have also been added spun off from feature stories. "SpyCat", created by Dick Siegel, is drawn by Ernie Colon. SpyCat speaks nine different languages ranging from Farsi to "dog" and is armed with "Adamwestium" claws and deadly cat-of-nine-tails. He writes free-form poetry when not waging war on America's enemies -- at home and abroad.

"Matt Daemon",also created by Dick Siegel, is written and illustrated by Mike Collins and is a spin off from the "SOS Matthew Daemon (Seeker of Obscure Supernaturals)" feature. Daemon's lair is located beneath Grant's Tomb. Daemon specializes in B-List Monster hunting.

"Alien Baby" by Craig Boldman chronicles the adventures of Moogera the dead beat alien dad, alien baby Ethan, and Stacy, his Earth-born mother.

"Bat Boy" is written and drawn by Danielle Corsetto and is a new spin on America's favorite hybrid.

Main article: Bat Boy

Possibly the best known of all the stories to come out of WWN. Bat Boy was first featured in a 1992 issue after being found in a cave. He has since led police on a high speed chase, fought in the war on terror, led the troops to capture Saddam Hussein, bitten Santa Claus, and traveled into Outer Space. In 2000, he gave his endorsement to Al Gore. It was foretold that Bat Boy would become president in 2028. The story of Bat Boy was the basis for an acclaimed off-Broadway musical, Bat Boy: The Musical, though the play ended tragically and ignores the continuity of the original stories. In addition to articles, Bat Boy has been featured in a comic strip since 2004, though it's said that only the articles are the "true" story of Bat Boy.

"A Scientist", is typically shown and quoted. He is known only as "A Scientist", and his findings are as close as WWN gets to having a reliable source.

Each week a different model is featured on page 5 and on the back page. She is usually wearing a bikini and a description of her is printed. This article has been absent from WWN since the Halloween issue of 2006.

See also: Page 3 girl at The Sun.

Weekly World News has frequently promoted the popular rumor that Elvis is alive. Numerous stories have been published featuring photos and interviews with a healthy, but notably aged Elvis Presley. In the late 1990s, they ran a front cover that said "Elvis Presley Dead!", claiming that he had been living a secret life since 1977, but was now "really dead".

Numerous stories regarding shockingly obese people and animals have made the pages of WWN, the most popular of which being Tonya, the world's fattest cat. After first being discovered, WWN encouraged readers to send in their guesses as to exactly how much they believed Tonya weighed. Weighing in at over 80 lbs, Tonya has been featured being adopted, and possibly sat on by the world's fattest woman. Later stories involved Tonya's attempts to lose weight through the "Catkins" diet, her struggle with anorexia, and claims that she had been eaten by the world's thinnest woman. Other stories have featured the exploits of the world's fattest couple at the gym, the world's fattest baby, and even a similar weight guessing contest featuring the world's fattest dog. One continuing story featured a morbidly obese man named Buster Simcus who had lost so much weight, it left 80 pounds of loose skin hanging off his body that he was planning to have surgically removed. By the next story, he blew up again, severely damaging his scars.

One of the other many recurring subjects is the occasional "ALIVE!" cover story. Most often the story pertains to some sort of human or creature, such as a mummy, prehistoric creature and occasionally a human who has been frozen in a block of ice (ex. Santa Claus.)

Another subject often tackled by WWN is the reemergence of many prominent figures believed by most to be deceased, including Marilyn Monroe, John F. Kennedy, and Adolf Hitler.

WWN cover stories often feature claims of the onset of a second Great Depression in the immediate future, in which many prominent celebrities, politicians, and icons of business will become penniless. The cover story of the June 6, 2005 issue warned that the second Great Depression was "just weeks away." Because of this, Texas Oil Tycoons were planning to flee to Luxembourg, the only country to survive this economic crash. The consequences of this depression would include:

• An 80% unemployment rate
• A collapse of all the nation's banks, causing them to call in all loans and mortgages, leaving a vast majority of Americans homeless
• An inability to afford any military program at all, forcing America to put an end to the War on terror
• A Somalia-like famine
• Hyperinflation, leaving all paper money worthless
• Enormous mobs of looters, ravaging towns and cities who cannot afford to pay police
• A disease epidemic caused by Americans unable to afford health care, including epidemics of cholera, tuberculosis, polio and even the bubonic plague
• The absence of food will force starving citizens to resort to cannibalism of deceased relatives
• China replacing the United States as the world's #1 superpower
• Americans overcome with despair will turn their backs on their religion and return to pagan religions, and possibly sell their soul to Satan. Christians who stubbornly continue to adhere to their religion will be burned alive, and have their virgin daughters sacrificed

A follow up in the August 15, 2005 issue reveals plans by China to buy a controlling interest in all of America's banks, effectively buying out the nation's economy. According to the article, China currently owns more than 100 US banks totaling roughly 17 trillion dollars, making them the majority shareholder in America.

Weekly World News is often the first to report the findings of biblical relics, including Noah's Ark, the Garden of Eden (it's in Colorado, they say), and the discovery of additional commandments from God. The magazine also claims to have obtained information when Jesus will return to Earth. WWN was also the first to speak of a pair of sandals worn by Jesus. Other stories claim that natural disasters such as earthquakes have opened up gates and portals to Hell from which demons have escaped which are now wreaking havoc upon the earth. A story shortly after September 11th, 2001 showed the face of Satan appearing in a cloud of dust caused by towers collapse. Similar stories had appeared before, wherein Satan's face had appeared in a thunderstorm.

Since the terrorist attack on September 11, 2001 WWN has often featured articles exposing plans for possible future terrorist attacks on the United States of America. A 2004 cover story leaked plans by Kim Jong-il to eventually invade and conquer the United States. Other stories have featured profiles on the location and nature of Iraq's Weapons of Mass Destruction, including the news that Saddam Hussein had an arsenal of giant slingshots and Dinosaurs. In 2003, a series of articles profiled the ongoing relationship, and eventual marriage of Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden. Other stories have made claims that Bin Laden is actually a dwarf, that he has recruited a cloned Adolf Hitler to join Al Qaeda or that he is in fact dead and that the CIA is keeping it a secret. Since being captured by Batboy, Saddam has been humiliated by female prison guards, won the United States lottery, and even demanded that the government pay for his sex change operation.

The April 25, 2005 issue of WWN revealed a thwarted attempt by terrorists abducted by aliens to hijack their UFO and fly it into the White House.

WWN is often the home to humorous political satire regarding current and past Presidential Administrations. The magazine has made past claims that the founding fathers were all gay and that George Washington was actually a woman. Abraham Lincoln, according to the paper, was mentally insane and his ghost has also been spotted in the White House giving President George W. Bush advice on the War in Iraq. Stories regarding President George W. Bush usually capitalize on the public's perception that he lacks intelligence. The paper has chronicled his plans to run for pope, and his intention to nominate Yoda as Secretary of Defense. The paper also reported his secret plans to invade the moon (which may possibly be ready to explode and destroy Earth) and mine it for the rich oil reserves discovered underneath. The June 21, 2004 issue even suggested that Vice President Dick Cheney is actually a Robot, and that his frequent trips to the hospital are actually to allow him to get his circuits rewired.

Aliens are another subject frequently tackled by WWN.

Weekly World News blames these creatures for holes in the ozone. A Roswell crash survivor, "Altair Bob", made contact with "WWN" via telepathic e-mail. Several factions of extraterrestrials have been using the moon to dump garbage. Martians have been monitoring the Mid-East crisis. Warrior aliens have been resurrecting the dead, fighting Big Foot and training in a mock US town hidden in Antarctica. San Franciscans have opened their hearts to emigrants from Mercury.

Cryptids and half-animal half-Human hybrids are frequently the topic of many issues of Weekly World News. Creatures such as Bigfoot, Merpeople, Real-life Catwomen, Half-Alligator Half-Humans, Frog Babies, Kangaroo Women, and many other creatures have swept the world by storm on various covers (Abominable Beachman strikes terror in Hawaii!)

The existence of merpeople is also frequently reported in the pages of the Weekly World News.

The most detailed account from the Weekly World News, recorded a mermaid being caught in a fishing net off of the coast of Florida on April 17. She was at least half-human, very sociable, and extremely intelligent. The mermaid measured five feet from the tip of her upturned nose to the end of her spiny, translucent tail. Experts which talked with WWN reporters say she was able to talk in a sophisticated "three dimensional language" that depends heavily on noises that could possibly be connected to the "click languages" prevalent in parts of Africa and on hand movements that look like sign language instructed to deaf people around the globe. A linguist who had spent several hours with the mermaid at an undisclosed marine study facility in Florida declared that once they are able to establish communication, everything known about human evolution, the specialness of human intelligence, everything thought about fish - "It's all going out the door". Four government agencies (at least) were reported as if involved in the care and study of the mermaid, including the Environmental Protection Agency, the Department of the Interior; the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service and the National Institutes of Health. An unexpected discovery, the only definite goals at the point of her capture were:

• Keeping her alive
• Figuring out how to communicate with her
• Deciding where she belongs in the hierarchy of the animal kingdom

The location of the research facility where the mermaid was being studied was never released to the public, but some 'sources' have led to an abandoned seafood-processing plant as an assumed location. DNA testing taking shortly after her capture proved that the mermaid's genes are split between both humans and fish; specifically, Homo Sapiens and a sea bass species that has been extict for over forty thousand years. The pictures confirm the fishermen's verbal description — "Up top, the mermaid has human breasts and arms, a pretty face and long, dark brown hair. Down below, she looks like any other fish, with silvery-blue scales, a sleek, tapered body and broad, powerful fins". U.S. Customs agents labeled the creature "an exotic fish not cleared for importation into the United States". Within hours of the exotic find, she was airlifted to the unknown marine research facility where the government scientists are said to be giving a complete medical check-up to see how closely connected to man is to the bizarre creature. One expert was quoted thusly: "If it can be recognized that humans share a substantial amount of genetic coding with the mermaid, the understanding of our origins may change. Instead of looking for missing links between man and monkeys in the jungles of Africa, we'll have to start searching for the missing link between humans and fish, and between humans and merpeople — the mermaids and the mermen." Since she was so strong, two crewmen had to pin down the mermaid to the deck by putting their knees on her shoulders while a third blew marijuana smoke in her face to sedate her. She was placed in an aerated tank that is normally used to keep lobsters and bait fish alive, once she calmed down. President George W. Bush took a keen interest in the mermaid and her well-being. He felt so deeply about the mermaid that he ordered two personal chefs to help with the creature's dietary needs. The dishes which he believed would benefit the half-human, half-fish were "two of his favorite comfort foods — Texas catfish and hush puppies with jalapeño bits. Details were released claiming the mermaid had a hearty appetite, thoroughly enjoying the food. In latest reports, she seems happy, broods when she's left alone, and perks up when she sees a human.

Similar to their female counterparts, mermen are found within the pages of the Weekly World News. On June 17, 2003, a merman was reported to have been caught in the South Pacific. The bizarre creature measured 28 inches, significantly shorter than a mermaid caught the following year in a fishing net (which measured five feet from the tip of her upturned nose to the end of her translucent tail). Though this most likely points to the fact that they might have been two separate merpeople species. Another contributing factor might have been the different area of the world in which it was caught. See also: Fiji Mermaid

A series of several articles dealt with a couple whose doctor told them they could not have more children, and whose only son, Christer, climbed out of his crib one night and drank chemicals under the kitchen sink. They decided to take his remains to a taxidermist and freeze dry him so he could stand in the corner, his hand grabbing the waistline of his diaper. The next story had them going to prison because it is illegal to dispose of a corpse in any manner other than burial or cremation without a statement in writing from the deceased. The parents eventually died in a boating accident. The final story had a collector of weird things buy Christer's remains in the couple's neighbors' garage sale for ten million dollars.

Years predating the Lorena Bobbitt case, Weekly World News was printing stories with titles like "Weirdo Cuts off Hitchhiker's Penis". Such stories of amateur penectomy have been common in the paper since the late 1980s. In the hitchhiker story, a trucker twice amputated hitchikers' penises, claiming in both cases that he was attacked, and neither organ was found, though one was allegedly flushed down the toilet. Other stories had philandering men in bathtubs with mistresses getting cut, or threatened with it, by their wives.

• A 2003 issue of Weekly World News reported that Saddam Hussein once starred in gay porn films. It was part of a series dealing with a homosexual romance between Hussein and Osama bin Laden.

• Marisa DeMatha, a Texas pool player with a mouth so large she can stuff it with multiple billiard balls.

• The chaos cloud, an enormous dustcloud in outer space, that is on its way to destroy the Earth in 2014. [3]

• In the 1997 film Men in Black, Tommy Lee Jones' character refers to the Weekly World News as the "best damn investigative reporting on the planet." In the movie, "every story in this paper is true" and leads the agents in their cases.
• In the 1993 movie So I Married an Axe Murderer, Mike Myers' character discovers secrets about his fiancee through clues found in copies of Weekly World News, which is religiously read by his character's mother, played by Brenda Fricker. It is in this movie that the paper is said to have the "8th highest circulation in the world." Myers' character says to his mother in this film, "You're the only person I know who refers to Weekly World News as 'the paper'".
• A thug character in The Naked Gun 2½: The Smell of Fear is seen reading two different copies of the newspaper.
• In the movie Repo Man, Otto can be seen reading an issue of Weekly World News while sitting at a desk in the office.
• In the movie Twelve Monkeys, a security guard at a mental institution can be seen reading a copy.
• In David Byrne's 1986 film True Stories, two teenagers stand in front of a shopping mall newsstand, cracking up while reading an issue of Weekly World News and quoting: "Starving peasants sell their bodies to vampires for blood money." The film itself is said to be inspired by stories read in supermarket tabloids like the WWN.
• During the 1992 US presidential election campaign, both George H. W. Bush and Bill Clinton were photographed reading WWN issues that depicted them meeting with P'Lod. Bush got a hearty laugh from the article and Clinton held his copy up at a campaign stop and joked that it proved his campaign had "universal" appeal. The WWN ran the photos of both candidates reading their publication, for once running pictures that had not been altered.
• In the 1994 movie Clerks. a customer references a newspaper saying "I saw one, one time, that said the world was ending the next week. Then in the next week's paper, they said we were miraculously saved at the zero hour by a Koala-fish mutant bird. Crazy shit."
• In the Neil Gaiman fantasy novel American Gods, Shadow buys a copy of the Weekly World News.
• In CW's Supernatural (TV series), Sam Winchester and Dean Winchester masquerade as journalists of the Weekly World News in "Bloodlust". The 2.15 episode "Tall Tales" featured a trickster who uses Weekly World News as his inspiration for unearthly mayhem. To cross promote the episode, both Weekly World News online and the print edition, February 19, 2007, ran a cover story featuring an interview with both Sam Winchester and Dean Winchester. The article was written by WWN Senior Editor Paul Kupperberg.

• Sun (supermarket tabloid). Sun deals with the same type of material as Weekly World News, but typically includes sections of color photographs.

In October 2006, Weekly World News relaunched its website in color. The site now includes video reportage and an Interactive Bat Boy Map. Other new features include "Share your Sightings" and categorizing breaking news in "National", "International", and "Intergalactic" news bureaus.

Headlines on the website are refreshed daily. Samples:

Security Blanket Actually Saves Child's Life http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/stories/75

Astronomer Rebuked For Endless Staring into Space http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/intergalactic_stories/48

• Weekly World News official website
• Badmouth.net interview with David Perel, vice president of the Weekly World News